How do you find out the population of Mexico? The census.

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What does DNA stand for? The National Dyslexic Association

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did you hear about the little girl who won first place in her school's spelling bee? she was hit by a bus

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Q. How do you wake up a sleeping rich man? A. By splashing acid in his face

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what kind of mexicans are NOT in the U.S. -legal

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Sarah Jessica Parker

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Why did the woman accuse a black man of stealing from a bank? Because she was eating a cornmuffin on the bench across the street when she saw a black man,stealing money from a bank

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Why did a Jewish man have no hair left? He recently got a haircut.

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Why was the black family eating KFC? Because KFC tastes very nice and there was a discount on the family bucket.

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What is Mary short for? She has no legs.

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What do you call a house big enough to fit all the poor people in America? A fairly large establishment without quality standards.

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your in court a woman police officer says anything you say can and will be held against you. the man replies titty

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What do you call a bird that can't fly? an ostrich

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Which is rather deceiving, Considering that the name 'violet' should naturally insinuate that the object it is describing is violet as well. Violet as a color is generally a deep shade of purple. Therefore, shouldn't the aforementioned plant, the 'violet', be violet in color as opposed to the blue color that is most widely accepted by the general populous?

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A Priest and a Rabbi find a very young lost child. They both agree that their religions obligate them to find the child shelter.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He did not have sufficient stability in his arm at that moment causing him to loosen his grip and drop his ice cream.

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What did one orphan say to the other? 'Robin get in the car!'

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WILLYS

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Josh Moran sticks polish sausage up his ear and moves it back and forth while squeezing his balls until they rupture.

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your momma is so fat she has diabetes

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Q: How many children did it take to screw in a light bulb? A: The light bulb was already screwed in and exploded after excessive tampering

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What's a vampire's favorite dessert? Vampire's don't exist What's Helen Keller's favorite dessert? Helen Keller doesn't exist

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Did you know Helen Keller has a pool? no oh well she does.

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How many babies does it take to paint a house? It depends on how hard you throw them.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops