What do you call a dog with no arms and no legs? Nothing, it cant come

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Q. Why was the black man sad? A. He had a book nailed into is leg.

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Why was the chair spinning Cause it wants to

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why did the chicken cross the road? IDGAC

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When the poop hits the fan and you walk in with your pants around your ankles, it's a bad sign!

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Sometimes i like to stand on my chair and pretend that i am a carrot.

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Your mother is so fat, she really could stand to lose a few pounds.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a nest of worms in your apple.

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Knock Knock: I have full blown AIDS

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Its over 9000 penises and they're all raping little children!!!!!

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What do you call a Mexican hot dog? Lunch.

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what has wheels and is red. A heart, i lied about the wheels.

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Awesome! I've just received my giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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a horse walks into a bar. the bartender asks, "Why the long face?" Unable to understand English, the horse shits on the floor and leaves.

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How much hard work does it take to become a man? To get to the other side!

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two muffins are in a oven the one muffin says jee its hot in here and the other muffin says wow a talking muffin

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why are the Harold and Kumar movies really funny? the man who wrote obvieusly has a good sense of humor.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "why the long face?" The horse replies "my whole family was killed in 911... And I used the money I got from life insurance to get plastic surgery to always have a smile on my face. My doctor botched the surgery, so now my face is elongated. Even for a horse, of course."

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Roses are red Violets are blue You don't want to be my valintine I'm going to shoot myself.

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what do you call a baby with a stamp on his nose.? Kentucky won the national championship this year

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Man says, "Hello" Girl, "Do you wanna go out?" Man, "With you?" Girl, "YES!" Man, "NO, bye!"

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Whats funny about alexis? she's really a boy!

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whats flat and useless? the walls of an abandoned house where land prices are increasing and properties are in high demand

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops