Boy: Why'd the chicken cross the road Mom: I don't know go ask the chicken

A white straight man, a black gay man, and an Asian bisexual woman walk into a bar. They are enjoying their drinks until one overly intoxicated man makes a remark towards the group in reference to their diversity in race, sexual orientation, and sex. The bar crowd is enthused with the drunk man's genius in not only constructing a joke to cover all three categorical descriptions of the group, but in guessing each member's sexuality based on their respective appearances.

Q:What's the difference between a turtle and a cat? A: One's a turtle and the other is a cat....

Two 16 year old girls are chatting on their way to school: Girl 1 : "hey, is that a hickey on your neck? say, have you been naughty? is it Brian's mark?" Girl 2 : "That's not a hickey, it's a bruise. My dad came home drunk again last night and beat me up for no reason."

A blind man is jumped and doesn't see it coming

What did the radiator say to the carpet? Nothing, a radiator is an inanimate object, and therefore is unable to speak.

Why did Sally fall off of the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sally

Why did the plane crash? Chuck Norris was sitting in it, and thus his weight was countless times larger than the lift force of the plane.

Yo momma so fat she soon became aware of her physical state and developed an eating disorder which led to her tragic death.

One day a woman wrote a letter to her husband whom was at war. He received it, read it, and was happy to know she was thinking of him.

What would the Swatch be called if it was made by a Croatian company? A Crwatch.

Why didn't Michael J. Fox feel the Virginia earthquake? He was on vacation in Maui.

Why did the little girl fall of the swing? Because she had no arms.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Houlocaust. What's worse than the Houlocaust? Nothing, the Haulocaust was one of the most horrible instances of inhumanity in recorded history.

A father and son get into a car crash. They go to the hospital and both the father and son are unconsciuos. The doctor comes in to the son's room and says, "I can't operate on this boy, he is my son. How could this happen if the dad is knocked out? It was a gay couple.

knock knock who's there me i kill you

what do you call a sick eagle illegal

What do you say to Jews at a synagogue? Hitler is coming

if you write treehouse backwards it spells gullible.

Hey have you seen Stevie wonders house? No? Don't worry he has'nt either.

What do you call a shark on land A dead shark

Why does Garrett have a small penis? He is not old enough to buy extenze.

You're so retarded that people make fun of you and you laugh with them because you don't understand and just want some friends.

Rivals? Someone from the past? Erron, who is "WE"! Tell me now!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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