How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at him.

Knock Knock Who's there? Mike Mike who? Just kidding, it's Danny. Oh okay, come in.

Your mother is so fat, that somebody should inform her of the risks of eating unhealthy foods because she could obtain life threatening diseases.

Why did the family at dinner not tip the waiter? He was mean and spat in their food.

knock knock who's there? nobody. then why are you knocking?

What's the difference between a black guy and a white guy??? Just different pigmentation of their skin.

What is the biggest lie that's still close to the truth? You came out of your momma's asshole.

a jew, a muslim and a christian all walk into a bar; because of the difference in religion im afraid such an event is unlikely to occur in the future.

What did the cripple wish for when he saw the shooting star? A toothbrush.

Q. If you're paddling up river and you lose three tires, how many pancakes does it take to cover a doghouse? A. Purple because ice cream has no bones.

Joe Paterno walks into a bar...he should've walked into a police station and filed a report.

Why is it good to date twenty eight year olds? Because there is twenty of them.

A Blonde Goes On "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire"

when u cant say fuck say firetruck because it starts with f and it ends with uck ?firetruck?

What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? Their color. What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill. What did Jane say when she saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the plums over the hill. She was color blind.

What does Jason say when he rages on cod ? I hope your family gets slaughtered in front of him ..

Joe:Hi Steve how was your day? Steve:Fine why do you ask? Joe:Because I am gay. Steve:Well if you are so happy tell your sister.

What is black and hangs on a rope next to a rebel flag in my back yard? A tire swing for my redneck kids to swing on.

Ask me if im a tree Are you a tree no

Your mom's so fat that when she stepped on the scale at the doctors office the doctor said " hey i wanted your weight not your phone number"

Next time someone says "I have mad money"... Say "whys it mad"

Opinions are like assholes, neither one can ride a bike, except for the assholes

So theres a Black guy, White guy and Mexican guy all sitting at a bar. They were friends.

Your momma soo fat.... that if she doesnt start exercising and eating right she will be more likely to get adult onset diabetes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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