There were three soap salesmen in a bar. They were comparing how good they were at selling their wares. "I'm so good that I sell 60% of my soap bars each day," says the first salesman, bragging. The second one wasn't to be outdone. "I'm so good that I sell 80% of my soap bars," he declared. The last salesmen, who, up to the moment had been relatively quiet, suddenly said in a calm and collected manner, "Oh that's nothing. I'm so good that I sell all of my soap bars each day."

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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What did the ice cream man ask the little boy? Want some ice cream?

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A horse walked into a bar. The bartender said "why the long face?" The horse then panicked, and feeling threatened, it kicked the bartender with its hind legs and galloped out of the bar. A civilian took immediate control of the situation and dialed the number for animal control, who arrived shortly and tranquilized the deer and put it back in its natural habitat. Don't worry, that didn't actually happen

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender says "Sorry sir we're closed" So the man goes: "Oh, okay. I wasn't sure if you guys were open till' 10pm tonight" and the bartender goes "No, thats only on the weekends" The man thanks the bartender and proceeded to leave the bar. He now knows the arrive earlier the following day.

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Why did the black man break up with his white girlfriend? Because he didn't love her anymore.

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A priest and a rabbi walks into a bar. The bartender looks at them and says "is this some kind of joke?".

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What shoots rockets but is not classed as a deadly weapon? A toy rocket launcher, I lied about the rockets.

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Why did the little girl fall of the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Doctor, doctor, i feel like a pair of curtains. Well I'm going to refer you to a mental institute and forward this meeting to a specialist due to the schizophrenic attitude and belief you have. However, I will have to ask you to come back in tomorrow or later today for further tests as to why you feel this way. This is highly abnormal and should be fixed immediately. Another further concerns please contact me asap.

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What is worse than 10 babys in 1 garbage can? 1 baby in 10 garbage cans.

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what comes in a can ? Beans Where do beans come from ? Cans

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms

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whats the difference between this joke and other jokes other jokes have a punch line

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What did the atheist say to the jew. Well first they had a long discussion about religion and the jew was actually made an atheist. Truly the work of God.

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What's the difference between katchup and musterd A very long list of things that I don't want to read

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It is so hot out here, that it could melt an ice cube that was once in the freezer!

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why cant the kid find any friends? he was stranded in a desert.

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roses are grey violets are grey either i am a dog or i am color blind i cant tell im deaf go die in a hole

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Knock Knock Who's there? (Pause) Who's there? Hello? Bloody kids

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Roses are red, violets are blue, take this medication, and call me if you have any symptoms of nausea or heartburn.

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why did joe diragi cross the road there was food on the other side

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A. Why did the boy cross the road? B. Why? A. I don't know! That's why I'm asking you.

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Why was the little boy sad? Because he just got paralized from the waist down and will never be able to walk again.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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