Joe Paterno walks into a bar...he should've walked into a police station and filed a report.

when u cant say fuck say firetruck because it starts with f and it ends with uck ?firetruck?

What is black and hangs on a rope next to a rebel flag in my back yard? A tire swing for my redneck kids to swing on.

How do you scare off a ghost? Tell him your ready for a commitment.

whats white jizz

What's red and weighs a metric ton? An apple, my scale wasn't calibrated

Q: What's big, green, fuzzy, and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A: A pool table.

whats black, then white, then dead all over? Michael jackson

Three men are facing a firing squad. They are all promptly executed. Even if they were to escape by distracting the executioners, they would no doubt be shot down before they could get for.

An American, a Mexican and a Cuban are in a car. For they are heading to the store to buy groceries and then come home to make dinner.

What do you call a dog with no legs? A seal.

jews

People who are addicted to brake fluid just can't stop.

A black man texts his wife to tell her that he is going to be late coming home from work.....Just kidding, pay phones cannot send text messages.

what did the red rock say to the blue rock? Nothing. Rocks can't talk.

What's green and doesn't fly? A broken green helicopter.

Yo momma so fat she jumped up in the air and got stuck.

a black man and a mexican are sitting in the back seat of a car....whose driving? their friend.

A guy has spikey things in his butt, what happened?............... He fell on a cactus.

Why did Suzie die? She ate too many fried twinkies.

what did Charlie Sheen say after he won a game of chess? I just won a game of chess!

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

Why did the vulture cross the road? To get to the pile of dead babies left over from the Holocaust.

Why can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom? Because dinosaurs died out 65.5 million years ago.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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