Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have five fingers, The middle one's for you.

A man walks into a bar not a duck though

What's redder than a red apple? 2 red apples

What`s the difference between a dead baby and a pencil? I don`t keep a pencil in my backpack

Who's obsessed with death and love to make jokes about it? The majority of the contributors in this site.

There was a papa tomato, a mama tomato, and a baby tomato. They were walking and baby tomato starts lagging behind. So the papa tomato stomps on the baby tomato and says nothing because tomatoes can't talk.

Did you know Helen Keller had a doll house in her back yard? -No Neither did she

Q. What's the difference between a duck? A. One of it's legs.

What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife? You aren't married to a girlfriend.

What's funnier than 10 dead babies? 11 dead babies.

Why was the baby crying? He had just witnessed his parent gets brutally murdered.

So, I was walking down the street. As i walked past a oak door an entrance to a mental institution, I heard a bored voice going, "eleven, eleven, eleven". My curiosity, like a cat, got better of me and I decided to take a peek through the key hole and see the eleven things being counted. As soon as I had my eye on the key hole, I was poked in the eye by a metal rod. Startled, I feel back to the street. And, sure enough, heard the same bored voice, going, "twelve, twelve, twelve".

Why did the man have sex with other men? Because he was homosexual.

What did the Ginger get for his birthday? A soul...................................……................……………•

Why did the giraffe fall over? Because I shot it with a bowling ball cannon,

XD, I know I noticed myself, I was like "why the fuck did I post that shit?" Rellez XD okay sistah, I think I am just gonna get some sleep now, but Nero, is not Justin Bibble the first one?

A man walks into a bar. It's a fine establishment. He orders a couple of beers and takes a cab home like a responsible man would. He is then killed with a croquet mallet.

A man walks into a bar and orders 12 shots. "8?" Asks the bartender, to verify he had heard correctly. He feels unsure of giving the man 12 shots but does so anyways due to his financial situation and he hopes for a generous tip. Afterwards, the man kills 9 people in a car crash due to his level of intoxication and the bartender seeps into depression due to his feeling of guilt.

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? If a wood chuck could chuck wood, it would depend on whether it wanted to or not. If it did want to, it could potentially chuck an infinite amount of wood in its lifetime

What kind of pizzas did they last order at the World Trade Center? Pepperoni

She loves me, she dosn't love me, she loves me, the girl walks up to the man and says, she doesn't love me

69.

How do you confuse a blonde? put her in a circular room and tell her to stand in the corner

why did the grandmother forget her grandsons name? she has Alzheimers so she is slowly forgetting all her relatives

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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