What's cooler than living on the sun? Everything, because the sun is the hottest entity in the entire universe. Plus, who'd want to live on the sun?

Q: What did the Catholic man say in response to the gay man asking what he likes to do? A: golf

Mommy, why did daddy leave? Because you touch yourself at night sweetie.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot lost control of the plane.

Roses are brown Violets are brown Who pooped in my garden?

A possesed goat: "moo"

how did the kenyan get away from the cup He didnt he got arrested

What did the little boy get for Christmas? Cancer.

Why was the pirate not allowed into the movie? tickets were sold out

Friends are like trees, They fall down if you hit them several times with an axe.

(waving left hand) Why doesn't Queen Elizabeth wave with this hand? Why? Because this is my hand.

So I have an idea that will solve both world population and hunger problems! I call it the Omni-Abortion law. The idea is that all babies must be aborted and then eaten. Progressive, right?

What is worse than writing a really terrible joke on anti-joke.com? Death.

Why'd the girl drop her lollipop? She got hit by a bus.

A black man accidentally walks into a white man......they apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

How do you say the weekend in French? The weekend in French.

What did the Asian man say to the Mexican man? Nothing, due to the language barrier.

Knock, knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who? It's Doctor Green. I've got some bad news about your test results. Can I come in?

Knock knock, Who's there? The police, you have committed 14 major felonies and you are being arrested.

Why did the murder walk up to the lady in the car? It was his mom.

What's the difference between Santa Claus and Tiger Woods? Santa Claus is a fictional old man who flies around delivering gifts, while Tiger Woods is a professional golfer.

whats better than 1,000,000 dollars? 1,000,001 dollars

what's up? my penis.

Why wouldn't anyone want Helen Kellers dog? It's been buried for a long time...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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