whats worse than being out in the cold? Being on the sun.

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how do you get a cat out of a tree? with boomerangs

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If life hands you melons. Your probably dyslectic.

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what starts with P and ends with u-b-e-s? Paul, can you brang me some priangles and the rest of my Rubik's cubes?

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an american walks out of a strip club.

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roses are red tulips are too, violets are violet, not freaking blue.

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A horse walks into a bar. "Why the long face?" asks the bartender. "I'm a horse, it's genetic." replied the horse, confused at the bartender's infantile understanding of evolution and other species.

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What do you call a lot of Chinese people in a confined place? A Chinese urban center.

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Why do dogs chase squirrels? Beacuse dogs have very low attention spands and also chase cars and cats.

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Why doesn't Santa Claus like cantaloupe? Because he doesn't exist. You have to exist to like cantaloupe.

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Periods are red, waffles are blue, some poems rhym, this one doesn't.

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Two trains, on the same track, left different stations, and travelled in opposite directions. 74 people died.

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Knock Knock. Whose there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

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What is just as important as Woman's Rights? Woman's Lefts, to maintain equality.

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poop

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? If the socket were 20 feet in the air, it might take 4 blondes with really good balance. Then again, it might not matter how many blondes there are because there are no replacement light bulbs, the don't have transportation, and the nearest store is 10 miles away. In conclusion, I would say that the number of blondes it takes to screw in a light bulb is dependent on the individual situation at hand.

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman asks "Why the long face?" The horse takes offense and replies "I was born like this."

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What do you call a clock that neither ticks nor tocks? A broken clock

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Sometimes I don't make sense, but when I do, I don't

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Why did the sloth cross the road? To slaughter your entire family.

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When life gives you lemons. Don't take things from strangers

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What's funny and old? I really do'nt know

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what did the terrorist get for christmas? probably nothing because terrorists are steriotypically muslim, but i imagine if not it was a gift close to his heart

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A Russian drinking something other than vodka.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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