Roses are red, Violets are blue, these two statement are obvious unless you are color blind

thumb_up thumb_down -31

How many napkins does it take to tack to the moon? Purple, snakes don't have elbows

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Why was little David sad? His father got hit by a truck.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Fred: says hi Bob: says shut up why the hell do you have to be so rude!!! Fred:thankyou ob thats better

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Damn kids and their evasive tactics.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

why did the kid drop his ice cream? Because he got hit by the ice cream van

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Why did the man get go to sleep? He got hit in the face with a hammer.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Q: You and a thousand other people are suddenly bursting in flames at a park, there is a big barrel of water just a few steps away from you, what do you do in order to save the people that truly matter? A: Stop drop and roll, duh!

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Knock Knock. Who's there? The Ambulance. Ambulance who? Sir, we're going to need you to come down to the hospital, your son is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Two polar bears are sitting in a bathtub. The first one says, "Pass the soap." "No soap, radio," replies the second one. "Oh, you want me to turn on the shower radio?" "Yeah, it's too quiet in here. I could use some tunes." The first polar bear turns on the radio. "Now pass me the soap, please," he says. The second bear passes him the soap, he washes his face and neck, and then they both get out and towel off. The second bear switches off the radio before they leave the bathroom.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

a horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "Why the long face?" Then the horse left because that question is racist to horses.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Why was the black racist guy and the white racist guy, who 0hated each other, afraid of Michael Jackson? They didn't want to be the other each others color.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Hey, wanna here a dirty joke? A pig fell in mud.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What did Helen Keller say when she jumped off the cliff? ........………………………………….…………….........................................................................………………,………………...........................................................................………………………………….…………….........................................................................………………,………………...........................................................................………………………………….…………….........................................................................………………,………………...........................................................................………………………………….…………….........................................................................………………,………………..................................................................... .

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Why did the hipster get burned? Because he was a volunteer fireman.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

So a black man steals a bike Because it was unlocked, and that was just poor planning.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

A blonde, a brunette, and a red head walk into a bar. It is a coincidence that none of them have the same hair colour.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

what do you call a fish with no gills? Dead

thumb_up thumb_down -33

A man walks into a bar. He orders a drink.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Q. Why did Sally fall off the swing? A. Because she had no arms Q. What smells like red paint and is blue? A. Blue Paint Knock Knock? Who's There NOT SALLY

thumb_up thumb_down -33

i committed murder

thumb_up thumb_down -33

A man walks into a bar After months of rehab he is giving in to his drinking abuse again and will ruin his life as well as his family

thumb_up thumb_down -33

knock knock whos there your mother open the door

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Suddenly a wild bunny appears ::::::::::::(:oI)

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops