What did Goldilocks ask the Three Bears? Nothing, bears are aggressive mammals and killed her before she could speak.

What is brown and sticky?… A shit…

What's green and eats nuts? Syphilis.

Why do girls wear makeup and perfume? Because they are ugly and they stink.

Shltskc gw? G

why did the boat crash? a tomato was driving

So a train conductor is going at 70 mph to to a destination 50 miles away. He goes over 3 hills, one at 20 mph, the other 42 mph, and the last at 63 mph. He crosses 2 bridges at 47 mph each. What did the train conductors mom eat for dinner that night Nothing she had cancer and died.

Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? It was probably a cold day.

Bill: Hey Bob guess what? Bob:What? Bill: your adopted

Knock Knock... Who's there? JUST LET ME IN!

Parents were talking about a particular whore house and tries to keep it secret to their son. Father: Bob and I saw the house near the river, its a whore house full of prostitutes. Mother: Shhh! Our son is listening. The Son enters the room. Son: Don't mind me, I know that area. Both parents were angry: So you've been there!? Don't deny, you know! Son: Just because I know doesn't mean I've been there. I know the moon has less gravity but I haven't been there.

How many Woman does it take to change a lightbulb? none they had a back up lamp

who is gay wit mon james cornish

Why did the man kill his friend? How am I supposed to know

What do you call a cat in a piece of bred? An inbred cat.

emma brown i did tap that shit -jackson edwards

A man and a bird are on the edge of a cliff. The man falls off and dies and the bird flies away because birds can fly and people can't.

Q; why did the German ask the Jew to go in his shower? A; because the Jew had stayed the night at the Germans house.

Have you ever seen the movie called "The Tourist"? No

What did the boy with no legs get for Christmas? A nice sweater.

Whats worse than the death of a celebrity? An anonymous person posting a joke on this site.

What's worse then the WNBA? Nickelback.

Whats the difference between the NBA and the WNBA? NBA players make more, have more fans, and play a real sport.

How do you make a little girl cry twice? Rub your bloody dick on her teddy bear

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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