Q:If a tree falls in the forest and nobody is here to hear it, will it make a noise A:That Philosopher probably had a lot of herbal tea in the morning

thumb_up thumb_down -12

1: I know a lot of people hate Mondays, but my least favorite day of the week is Thursday. 2: Can I ask why? 1: Of course you can. Everyone has free will.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

whats nun plus nun two nuns haha!! from jarod :}

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the jew go into the gas chamber? Because he thought he was going to get a shower.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Suck pussy

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the Europeans colonise Africa Because they couldn't do it themselves

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What did the helicopter say? Aluminum-minum-minum-minum-minum-mum-mum-mum-mum-um-um-um-um

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How did the man eat 100 mints in one bite? I'm not sure myself, but we can agree on one thing, his breath is gonna fresh.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why does Joel get so many numbers from girls? Because he asks for them nicely.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's the difference between a Pile of Dead Babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamboghini in my garage

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A white guy a black guy and a mexican are in a car and the car crashes and blowes up who dies? They all die cuz they all were in the car when it blew up

thumb_up thumb_down -12

An elephant walks into a bar. It was so big that it broke a lot of things.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Q: You know why the floor is so clean? A: Because the janitor puts a lot of hard work into it.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

In Soviet Russia, people commonly suffered under the might of the communist juggernaut. It was unpleasant.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the African boy die? He was denied any antibiotics to heal his severe case of mono and AIDS, and was living on dirty water and dirt.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Adele walks into a bar. The barman says she's too ugly hahahahahahahahahahhahahahha lololololololololololololol

thumb_up thumb_down -12

a white guy, a black guy, and a spanish guy all jump off a building. they all immediately die on impact, later on the news white guy jumps off building.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

kieran is a homosexual

thumb_up thumb_down -12

In Soviet Russia, everything you do will have an equal and opposite effect, for the laws of physics still apply in every part of the world. No matter where you are.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A German, an Irishman, a Mexican and a Texan are flying together on an airplane over the ocean. When the plane begins to experience engine trouble, they find that there is only one parachute for the four of them! Through an amazing display of flying skill, however, the pilot is able to complete the flight and land safely.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Someone: I like my coffee like I like my men Someone else: Black? Someone: No, tied up, shoved in a burlap sack, and dragged through the mountains.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Two muffins are in an oven. They procede to bake at 325 degrees for thirty minutes.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops