What is worse than getting hit by a bus? 9/11

What did i say to the stupid person? Your Stupid.

Whats worse then dieing and going to hell? Waking up and going to school.

If you have 12 apples and I have 12 ice cubes how many pancakes fit on a roof? Purple because aliens don't wear hats.

wanna hear a cat joke? just kitten

what do you call a black man, white man, mexican, irishman, indian, and chinese man being hung at the same time? -a racially diverse pirate crew

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

What do you call a black man that is wearing a suit? Whatever his name happens to be

What is black and white and has 4 wheels? A zebra, I lied about the wheels

Why is an elephant big, gray and lumpy? Because if it was small, white and smooth it would be an Asprin.

Question to make it sound like a racist joke? Politically correct answer that should not offend anyone.

What do you call a sausage with no sauce? A giraffe.

Q: Did you hear the joke about Helen Keller? A: Neither did she...

What did Billy Mays eat for breakfast? nothing, he's dead.

Knock Knock Who's there? You You Who? Yes? Can I help you madam?

What did the astronaut say when he stepped on the moon? Oops, sorry.

what did the guy do at the funeral? cry because his wife died

What did the Priest say to the kid walking home alone? Be safe.

What does Jason say when he rages on cod ? I hope your family gets slaughtered in front of him ..

How do you stop a lumberjack? You thrust a javelin through his lungs

whats black, white, and red all over? your mum

Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Your husband died.

i'm an inbred jew - Barras

mary poppins' handbag is full of fuckin dick

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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