A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar They are friends and continue to have a pleasant evening

I know that a lot of people don't like morbid jokes, for it isn't everybody's cup of liquidized dead baby.

What do you call a black guy that drives an airplane? A pilot.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was walking.

whats worse than four babies in a box? one baby in four boxes

What did the lawyer name his daughter? Nothing. The lawyer is sterile and can never have children.

What has 17 eyes, 43 toes, 11 feet and, 9 heads? A 17 eyed- 43 toed- 11 footed- 9 headed monster.

What's the best thing about having sex with twenty six year olds? There's twenty of them.

A guy walks into a bar, sits down, and gives a heavy sigh. The bartender asks, "What's wrong?" The guy says, "Nothing."

Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red Paint

What did the therapist say to the other therapist? Your skin looks dry, let me lend you some ointment.

How did the frog fly? It drank a magic potion. How did the snake fly? It ate the frog How the the eagle fly? It already can.

That akward moment when you tell a person you like them and they don't respond.

Why couldn't Timmy enjoy his ice cream? His lips were sewn together by an evil seamstress who was mad that he stole all of her Pop-Tarts

Two scientists are experimenting with sulfuric acid. One scientist says to the other, "Did you see the new intern?" In the process of turning to face the first scientist, the second scientist knocks the beaker over and spills sulfuric acid all over the first scientist's hand. The first scientist writhes in pain as the second scientist rushes to find a strong base to neutralize the burn. After a few minutes, the first scientist is rushed off to the emergency room and suffers from some serious chemical burns.

What make's a constuction worker drop's his hammer? MC Hammer moves.

Did you hear about the two guys that stole a calender? They each got six months.

Robin, get in the Batmobile.

A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

Jerry Sandusky walks up to the reception desk at a day care center. What does the lady at the desk say? Nothing, she promptly gives Mr. Sandusky his son and they leave.

A man and a hobo meet on a narrow path. What does the hobo do? Finds the mans wife and impregnateds her, aborts the baby, takes dead fetus chops it up and makes the man eat it in a salad. While the man is chocking he shotes him and walks on.

What is worst than a black guy hanging on a tree. A burnt black guy hanging on a tree

how many babies can fit into a microwave i dont know i havent tried

Hey! Have you ever heard of the Alzheimers joke?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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