"When there's something srange, in your neighborhood... who you gonna call..?" The cops

What did one muffin in an oven say to another muffin? Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects thus incapable of sppech.

A unicorn, a smart blonde, a dragon, and a hobo are in a maze who gets out first? The hobo. The other 3 don't exist. By Adam Chebali

Gretta has five legs? -no

Why did the cow hail a taxi? Because cows can't drive.

You have 37 candy bars and you give your friend 12. What is the square route of the sun? Yes

2 wales are at the bar one looks at the other and dose a wale call for 5 long minutes and the other one reply's "dude your drunk we got to go"

What's worse then ten dead babies in a barrel? The one at the bottom is still alive.

A black man, a Mexican man, a Jew, an Asian man, and a white man get into a fight. Who won? Well since their dispute got all the way to a fight, I guess nobody really wins.

What did the racist white guy say to the black guy? "I don't like Asians."

Why didn't the man tip his waitress? Because he's a cheap bastard.

Haikus are easy. But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

What do you call man with no limbs or a head? Your neighbor.

What did one cow say to the other? Moo.

What happens when you Shoot a guy with a red Shirt On? He Dies.

You are right, the past still has its claws deep within me thank you friend.

What's worse than being in the Holocaust? Dying in the Holocaust.

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

Frontbut-

what would happen if you took all the veins out of your body and laid them out tip to tip? you die

Q:Whats worse than stubbing your toe? A: Watching a terrorist saw your dads arm off.

Why did little Bobby put a firecracker in the dog's ass? Don't worry he used lube.

What's the difference between an Elephant and a Post Box? An Elephant is not a Post Box. It is an Elephant.

how do you kill justin bieber? put a bag over his head and suffercate him.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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