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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU..

A man walks into a chiropractor. The chiropractor asked whats wrong with you? The man replies My boner has scoliosis.

Why did the college student post unfunny anti-jokes on anti-joke.com? Because he was bored shitless.

A Mayor accidently killed one of the citizens of his town through dangerous driving. He could not be charged with murder, as it was an accident, but there was an uproar, and he was humiliated beyond question and forced out of office straight away. Even his family rejected him, owing to the fact that the unfortunate citizen he struck was his son's girlfriend.

Why did the Old Lady cross the road? Because the worm selected her as a weapon

Three kids are playing on the swings. One of the kids falls off. He then gets up, gets back on the swing and continues playing.

Roses are red violets are blue What the heck do flowers Have to do with You?

Chuck Norris once round-house kicked someone so hard that he broke his leg.

What did one sexy babe say to the other? We are sexy

why did the boy fall off his bike? because his mum through a fridge at him

Why did the little boy die? His mother got an abortion...

what do you call a million black people on the moon? a good start

What did the red paint say to the blue paint? They said nothing. Paints don't talk and you need to see a doctor if you answered anything else.

Knock knock Who's there? Knock Knock I said who's there? My name is Knock Knock Oh hi Knock Knock, come in

what did one waiter say to the other? were waiters.

Why was the chocolate black? It's not black you idiot, its white

What's the worlds best ice cream? Well overall I opinion is that because but I believe down to the but don't forget to mention that chocolate ice cream plays a huge however to flip the argument moreover I find it absurd that on the plus side four sides to tell the truth I wouldn't know to summarize the argument whereas to differ I would my final point is that Chocolate Ice cream is nice.

What is black, tastes like crap, lands in a toilet, feels soft and mushy, sometimes red, blue, yellow, purple and pink, feels very heavy. eats cookies, drinks soft drink and lights fires? A fat person in a coloured suit.

A penguin walks into a bakery. The baker asks the penguin: "What kind of bread would you like? Brown or white?". Penguins answers: "Well, it doesn't really matter since I came here by car!".

Rozes r read Vilets r blew iy cahn noht spell becuase i am blind.

I dream of a better tomorrow, where chickens can cross the road without their motives being questioned.

What do you do when you have a baby and your being shot by a terrorist. You use the baby as a shield.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was being raped and was fugitive lot trying to escape, to no avail.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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