Roses are red and so is venus now kneel down and suck my penis:)

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Two hunters are out in the woods, one of them collapses on the ground and his eyes roll back in his head. His friend whips out his cell phone and calls 911. He gasps,"I think my friend is dead, what do i do?" The operator says,"calm down lets first make sure he's dead." There's a silence, then a shot. Sadly the man was not dead but extremely tired and could not carry on without rest.

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roses are red, violets are blue, if you want to success, stop being a mess..

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? I hit her with a shovel.

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What has three legs, one eye, and is green and fuzzy. I don't know. Me either.

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Why can't Timmy go on any rollercoasters? Because he's morbidly obese and it would a safety hazard.

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why did victor have a tube on his neck he was helping james with security

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What did the farmer say to the other farmer? We are both farmers.

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knock knock. Who is there? You have. You have who? Your entire family in my basement.

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How do you make a clown stop smiling? Hit her in the face with a ax!

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Roses are red, violets are blue.. Oh i can't finish joke coz i gotta go poo ! :/

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Why did the girl fall off the swingset? Because she got hit by a refridgerator.

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What's the oppicite of brown???? Something not brown.

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Q. Why dont people like shane murchan ? A. Because he wears chinos .....

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead become stranded on a desert island. As they are searching for food and shelter, they come across a mystical-looking lamp. They rub the lamp, but nothing happens because genies don't exist.

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WELCOME TO THE GARLIC BOYS SHOW! So kids, what are we gonna eat today? POTATOES! FUUUUUUU! Moral: You say tomata, I say WROOOOOOOONG, you say cheap I say your mother.

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Q: How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if he tore his ACL last week trying out for wood chucking nationals? A: Woodchucks don't possess the ability to chuck wood, nor do they have ACLs.

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9/11

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what do German people eat at BBQ ' s ? burgers and hotdogs and kebabs and fried chicken with a garnish of summer salad washed down with a cold mouth tingling glass of coca cola and jews

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Whats the difference between a baby and a sandwhich... I dont rape my sandwhiches before i eat them

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One fish... Two fish... Red fish... I have AIDs

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Why was the camel sad he wasnt, camels dont have feelings

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What do you call a Gay leprechaun? A homosexual ginger man with a pretty green outfit.

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What's worst then a road kill? Multiple road kils.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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