What did the fat man do? He fell over...

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What did one dog say the the other dog? "We are both dogs"

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If life throws you lemons, get under some shelter so you don't get pelted by flying fruit and worry about making lemonade later.

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Why is there an owl out during the day? I don't know.

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Knock, Knock Wh- SWAT TEAM GET ON THE F****** GROUND!!!!!!!

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? nothing he was Jewish

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Why did Jimmy fall over? Jimmy was hit by a bus.

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Whats the difference between a black man and a bucket of shit? The bucket.

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A Palestinian woman asks a man for directions. She is promptly stoned to death.

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How does a woman scare a gynecologist? By pulling human entrails out of her purse when he asks her to provide insurance.

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roses are red, violets are blue, Hitler killed 6.6 million jews.

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A homeless guy walked up to me and said "Any change?", to which I replied, "Nope, your still homeless". We laughed and laughed. The he stabbed me.

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So my wife was in the kitchen, and I asked her to make me a sandwich. She agreed. I then volunteered to make her one. Lesbian relationships are amazing.

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What do you get when you mix a Refrigerator with a dog? Nothing. That would be impossible.

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Knock, Knock Whos there? Banana Banana Who? Banana i didn't say your moms dead.

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a piece of string walks into a bar and the bartender says “sorry we dont serve your kind here” so the string goes outside twists himself round and ruffles up one of his ends then walks back into the bar, the bartender says “aren’t you the piece of string i just kicked out?” the string then replies “i’m a frayed knot”

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How do you kill somebody? A: I don't know, I'm not a murderer.

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What did the 11 year old boy get for christmas? A wet dream

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Asked by the court barber how he wanted his hair cut, the king replied: ‘In silence.

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A family goes to a talent agency and performs an act. They call themselves the aristocrats

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Knock knock Who's there? A Jehovahs Witness

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whats worse than failing your maths test?

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Why did the girl stop running? Because she is in a wheelchair and will never walk again

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What did the cat say to the dog? Meow.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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