Why are cats mammals? Because they are descended from primordial mammals in the distant past which are the common ancestors of all mammals.

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Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

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Doctor I have a headace! The doctor was dead.

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What did the rake say to the shovel? Nothing, they're both inanimate objects.

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Yo momma so fat she soon became aware of her physical state and developed an eating disorder which led to her tragic death.

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why did the girl cross the road? no one knows because she was hit with a car and died on impact.

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Denard Robinson

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Why did the pengoon cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken

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I farted and it smells like rotten ham with melted cottage cheese now dislike this please.

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David walks into a bar. Someone shoots him. Now hes dead.

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your mommas so fat she jumped for joy and got stuck

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Q.What is black and white and red (read) all over? A. A penguin in a blender.

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Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

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What do you call a bunch of black people buried up to their hair? Afro turf

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What do Black people call their fathers? Dad.

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Why are there cookie's in the jar? 'Cause I put cookies in the jar

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Why did the chicken cross the mobius strip? TO GET TO THE SAME SIDE!!!BAZZINGA!!!

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Rivals? Someone from the past? Erron, who is "WE"! Tell me now!

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Wgat did the umpire say to the asian batter? Foul ricebowl!

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In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

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Why did Larry drop his suitcase? Because he had no arms. A) Knock knock, B) Who's there? A) Not Larry

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-Knock Knock - Who's there? - Child Protective Services, we have multiple reports of you abusing several of your children...

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why did the squrill leave his home an ax-man cut it down

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What is a waste of time and money? Your mother.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops