whats shaped like a tree. A tree.

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What did the muslim do at the airport? He bought a ticket to New York and proceeded to fly there to mourn his brother who was killed during the terrorist attacks on 9/11.

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Whats the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babies? The Porsche isn't in my garage

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Q: Why do Asian children tend to be smarter than other children A: They have longer school years

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good morning. good day. good night. good to see you santa

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Two chinese friends are chatting, and one says ????????? His friend says ??????? After that, the first one says ???????????, and you keep reading this like if you understood chinese.

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was DEAD! But why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey... But then why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? P-p-p-p-eer pressure

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What did the blonde say to the other blonde? "Hey, do you want to get something to eat?"

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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Jack and Jill went up the hill. But it was winter and they froze to death

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Disreguard Females Aquire Currency

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile.

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Your momma's so fat she has a hard time finding clothes to fit

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What's worse than the holicost? The ninja turtles

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? Anal

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Why did the teenager take a shower? Because she was brutally raped by a serial rapist and felt dirty. Unfortunately for her, she was unaware that she was washing off the prints from her body and the rapist was never found

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Q) How do you kill a blue elephant? A) Shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a pink elephant? A) Hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a white elephant? A) Tickle it until it turns pink, hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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why did john wear a red hat? because blue is his favorite color

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Your mum is so ugly that i make jokes about how ugly she is

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What's the difference between cancer and my grandmother? She doesn't have cancer.

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Why did James drop his ice-cream? He was mourning the loss of his mother to terminal illness so he threw himself in front of a train.

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What do you get if you cross a sheep with a kangaroo? Don't be ridiculous. First of all, scientifically this is near impossible and secondly, what use would a kangaroo with wool be? Sheepdogs would become obsolete and they would be a nightmare to shear. Imbecile.

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Roses are red violets are blue I'm gonna rape you with a stick

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Why can't you lie to atoms? Because they make up everything!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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