Dad: hi son Kid: (looks sad and looks at the ground) Dad: what's wrong son. Kid:I raped a girl. Dad:Who? Did you rape son! Kid:mom.

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What do you call a man with no arms in the middle of the ocean? Mike.

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What did the blond say to the ginger Stop drop and roll your hairs on fire

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My grandma's star sign was cancer, and it was really ironic how she died, actually... She was attacked by a giant crab.

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hi

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A jewish man walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder, the bartender asks "where'd you get that" the man replied "at a pet shop"

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a man jumps of a cliff and ..... hits the ground

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I'm a wise old man, so I'm aloud to touch you in the bathing suit area.

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knock knock whos there santa santa who .....long pause he doesnt exist now go shoot urself

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How did the carpenter do on his exam? Poorly so his parents killed him.

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If you spill milk Don't cry over it..... Clean it up.

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I going to the kitchen to make a #sandwich.....oh wait this isn't twitter

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Two muffins are in an oven. After a set period of time, they finish baking and are enjoyed by the family who had made them. Two weeks later the eldest daughter contracts syphilis thanks to numerous sexual partners. She soon dies leaving her parents and brother depressed. Her brother is kidnapped by a viscous child predator and the mother commits suicide. The father gets a job with the New York Yankees. He is eaten by a genetically modified zebra.

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Why did the gitl fail her cooking class? Because she was abused and severely beaten by her teacher

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the side of the road? A: To get to the other vagina

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Yo mama is so fat , she died of a heart condition

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Q:Why did the boy drop his ice cream? A: A terrorist threw a refrigerator at him then slapped the ice cream out of his hand

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How do you know you're on a blind date with a black person? If they agree to eat at KFC in Compton (Wyndellberg)

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How did the blind man cross the road? With the use of a cane and a registered seeing eye dog

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roses are red, violets are blue, my son is gay, f**k my life...

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Did you ever notice how Bill Nye has a "labrotory" filled with young innocent children? hmmm, very suspicious!

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-Why did the chicken cross the road? '' I dont know '' -Because it would cross the road and over to you. -Knock knock? '' Who's there?'' - CHICKEN!!!!!!!

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Q-what did lady gaga say to the retard when he asked why he's so stupid? A- Cuz baby u were born this way

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How do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open it up and stick him in. How do you put a giraffe in a fridge? Take out the elephant and put in the giraffe.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops