How do you confuse a blonde? The same way you confuse a brunette or redhead, hair color has nothing to do with an individual's intelligence.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

There are two kinds of people in the world: Those who can count and those who can't.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well it all began in 1807 when a 7 foot rooster gave birth to a chicken on the sidewalk while purchasing ice cream. Scientists have been intrigued so they went into study with it and won the Nobel prize. This somehow persuaded them to lure the chicken over to the other side by using a lollipop. They threw the lollipop as the chicken crossed the road, hit it in the eye, the chicken spazzed out, jumped in front of a car, teleported to London, and is now a gynecologist.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Q: What did the kid say after he told a stupid joke? A: Well they banned me from Anti-Joke!!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A man walks into a bar The bartender asks: What would you like to drink?

thumb_up thumb_down -13

There are two muffins in the oven. The first says to the other, "Its getting hot in here." The second, befuddled, replies, "AHH! A talking muffin!"

thumb_up thumb_down -13

There are 4 people in a crashing plane, but there are only 3 parachutes. But, the teenage girl says she is depressed and cannot go on. The older woman breaks down into tears because she is reminded of her rough child hood. The two 21 year old twins start crying, too, because they were corrupted by their alcoholic father who would come home and abuse their family. As they were all crying, the two pilots and the flight attendant took the parachutes and jumped. The older woman realized she went to flight school when she was young so she took control. They were are happy and drank a little bit too much alcohol and got drunk. The pilot also drunk and crashed into a huge skyscraper. This catastrophe was later named 9/11.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Your mother is so fat. We are all extremely concerned for her health.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do you get when a fat kid eats a donut... A Heart Attack.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

what's worse than 10 dead babies in one trash can? 1 baby in ten trash cans

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Life is like a box of chocolates, some are brown, and some are white.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Q:Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? A:He slipped and fell. Q2:Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? A2:He was stapled to the first monkey. Q3:Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? A3:Peer pressure.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

How does a guy with no arms kill himself? It's called murder.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do Jay Williams, Lebron James, Candace Parker and Maya Moore have in common? They were all winners of the Morgan Wootten Player of the Year Award.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? having your titties super glued to a triceritops' as cheeks while the triceritops has chronic diahrea

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Rose are red, Violets are blue, I have AIDS, Now so do you.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do you call a blonde person? By her name.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Whats worst than getting bombed by the russians? The holocaust!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

How do you make a grown man cry? Fling a rubber band at him.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Imagine that we take all of the elephants in the world and laid them out end to end in space Did you know all of the elephants would die Nature fact

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What's the difference between a pizza and a Jew? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

They say duck tape can fix every thing, Not my grandma's cancer for that matter.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Who is JP? A really smart kid! HAHA jk

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the woman make so many sandwiches? She was a mother catering for her child's sporting event.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops