An elderly lady walks into a grocery store, and nothing of a great significance happens.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

thumb_up thumb_down -13

all hail based mark

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A horse walked into a bar, and the bartender asked, "Why the long face?". The horse replied, "It's evolutionarily efficient to have an elongated skull so that I can eat vegetation with ease."

thumb_up thumb_down -13

hey I just met you and this is crazy but get in my van

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did I write this joke Because I'm board as hell

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A blonde, brunette, and a redhead are taking a chemistry exam. They each get a solid B on the test.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the one friend hate the other friend? Because the one friend didnt do a map for social studies he should've done and skipped school for that class and when he came back, the other friend told the social studies teacher he was here and he had to turn in an unfinished poster and now he is a crybaby bitch about it.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Three men are stranded, mid-ocean, in a small rowboat. They realize quickly that their imminent demise is slowly creeping into the forefront of their consciousnesses. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. A problem reared it's head as it became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore and, in turn, salvation. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A guy walks into a bar and says, "I'm Japanese". The guy at the counter says "What a coincidence! I am Japanese too." He gets seated and the guy next to him says, "I'm Japanese too." The bar is in Japan.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Roses are red, violets are blue No they're not, violets are violet

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Did you here about the 2 guys who wanted to go to Paris? They didnt go!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What did a pornstar say when she heard hard banging from the front door? Come inside.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why was OJ Simpson's knife covered in blood? Because he just murdered his wife.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

a very large and muscly guy walks into a bar and finds a scrawny white guy he asks him if he has ever been in a fight with someone bigger then him the man says no the large man then leaves the bar and they both continue on with their day

thumb_up thumb_down -13

whats worse than catching your parents having sex? having sex with your parents

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Two Penn State administrators walk into a butt.-South Park

thumb_up thumb_down -13

roses are red violets are indigo

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Q.Whats the difference between a black guy and a bench? A.One is a human and the other is an inanimate object used to give people a rest.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Q: What is Kony's favorite rapper A: SOULJA BOY!!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Ask me Whats 2+2. ? Ok what's 2 plus 2 4 you dumb ass

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get slaughtered.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

One of my nipples is a different colour from the other two. Is this normal? The Doctor replied with the answer no and said you have cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Hey i just met you and this is crazy but your adopted banana

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops