How do you get a black man down from a tree? Cut the rope!

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In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

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Roses are red, Violets are purple not f**cking blue!

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a man was shot.... he died

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Q: Whats black and green and goes 100 mph? A: A black and white car going 100 mph.

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why do woman love the twilight books? i have no idea woman can't read

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Why did Susie fall off the swingset? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

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A wise man once said, "I am wise".

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You know what's funny? You got AIDs

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One night a policewoman pulls over a drunk driver. She politely asks him to step out of his car. He willingly does so. She says, "Anything you say can and will be Held against you." He replies "BREASTS."

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What did Sam Houston Say to Jim Bowie when he say all the Mexicans coming Towards the Alamo? That's a lot of Mexicans.

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What did the raped girl get for Christmas? Pregnant.

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What's black and white and red all over? I don't care I have AIDS

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Why do Jews have such large noses? Hereditary genetics.

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A muslim walks out of a plane.

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Bill: Hey Bob guess what? Bob:What? Bill: your adopted

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Knock knock Who's there? The bank. We've come to evict you from your house.

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Q:What did the deaf kid say to the blind kid? A: nothing deaf kids can't talk they can only have conversations with their hands,which would be pretty useless at this moment cause the blind kid can't see his hand guestures

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what do u call a lesbian with long hair? a long haired lesbian.

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Q: How many Babies does it take to paint a garage? A: babies do not have good motor skills therefore, they can not hold a paint brush.

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Why is Easter better than christmas? Theres a significantly less chance of getting raped by a man in a Santa Claus costume.

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knock knock whos there? andy andy who? andy gold hi come in

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What can be smooth but also rough? Endoplasmic Reticulum

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What's bigger than a moose? An even bigger moose.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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