What did the retarded handicap say to the bully who called him the biggest retard in the world? "atleast I didn't make SOPA"

blargen fa-diddle nachen!

Double-whammy

Person 1 Hey man what's up Person 2 nothing much I just impregnated your mom

What's the difference between an iPhone and a Samsung Galaxy? Google it, there are many differences.

A guy is at a party and he's really thirsty, so he goes to get a drink. He goes to get some soda, but the line is too long. He goes to get some water, but the line is also too long. He goes to get some punch, and it turns out there's no punch line.

kid: dad! a kid called me gay today! dad: son, im 100% ok with u hurting that kid! kid: i cant! hes too cute.

A man walks into a bar. He orders a Guinness.

whats wores than eating a vag. a gaint vag eating you.

What did the traffic light say to the car? dont look at me am changing.

Why did Julie fall off a swing? 'Cause she had no hands. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Julie, that's certain.

Why did suzy not eat her breakfast? because i stapled her to the table.

Q: Why was the little boy late for school? A: His face was stapled to a wall.

How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? All of them.

Why was the boy scared? Well, his mother had recently taken up Satanical ideals and in an attempt to sacrifice themselves to the Dark Lord, she drove her car off a cliff and into a lake. Now, with his dead mother in the drivers seat, no way to call emergency services, and 300 feet of water between him and the surface, you can see why he'd be scared.

Why couldn't jack join the football team? Jack has down syndrome

Why was the boy sad? Because his pet bird couldn't fly. Why couldn't the bird fly? Because it was dead.

A: what did one apple say to the other apple. B: Nothing apples cant talk

You know what they say about a man's feet... No i don't.

A blonde dies Lololol

Whats the difference between a nigro and a nigro... They are both BLACK!

What's brown and sticky? ...A stick.

Good friends are like snowflakes. They disappear when you pee on them.

A young boy is concerned about the well- being of his father, due to the fact he may have cancer. Turns out, he doesn't. So they got ice cream.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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