What’s the difference between Cool and Kool, the way you spell it

How do you escape from being enlisted in the army of your nation? Flee to a different country and bring along your valuables.

knock knock who's there? the police you are wanted for 5 counts of 1st degree murder.

Want to hear a joke? Womens rights

A young Asian boy got a B on his test. He went home an showed his parents even though he was nervous of their reaction. They told him that a B was a good grade and put it on the fridge. After that he began to gradually flunk each class one by one because of his parent's inability to push him to be better. He is now homeless and an alcoholic.

what's the difference between babies and a trampoline? I take my shoes off to jump on a trampoline.

Patient: "Doctor, I've got a strawberry stuck up my bum." Doctor: "I've got some cream for that."

Q : Why did the girl fall off the swimset ? A : Gravity pulls smaller masses towards larger masses, so the girl being the smaller mass, got attracted to the bigger mass, AKA the Earth, and that's why she fell.

I love you.

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? The chicken was locked in a cage and the nearest intersection is about a mile away.

How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? Well that would be crude and insensitive to ask a person with dementia to do a task so easily performed by a person who is not non compos mentis.

What's worse than the conservatives? Nothing, because conservatives fuck everything up.

Guess what? SHADAP

A Catholic Priest, an Anglican Priest, and a Rabbi were in a train carriage together because they got a package deal to go to a conference on religious tolerance. Good for them.

I was having sex with my girlfriend the other night and she called me a pedofile. i told her that was a pretty big word for a 9 year old.

What do you call an epileptic in a bowl? James, if that happens to be his name.

whats the difference between a ferrari and a pile of dead babies? i dont have a ferrari in my garage

dildo

I like jokes.

How did the mecanic die? He drowned

Q:What type of cheese isn't yours? A:NACHO CHEESE!!!!!!!!!

How many spots does a giraffe have? Depends on the giraffe.

Q: How do you stop a baby from spinning in circles? A: Nail his other hand to the floor

Why was the boy hot? Because he was stuck in an oven.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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