Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. -Knock Knock. -Who's there? -Not Sally.

What is red and has two legs? Half a cat.

Three men were lost in a desert when a genie appeared and granted them each a wish. they died of dehydration shortly afterward, never realizing they were hallucinating.

What did one ginger say to the other? W are both gingers.

Q: How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Let's go ride bikes!

When life gives you lemons, squirt the juice in life's eyes. Then life won't trust you with lemons.

That dress looks amazing on you considering how fat you are.

Q: What's black, white, and red all over? A: A horribly maimed zebra.

What's small, black and at the top of a burning building? Oh shit - I forgot my baby

Your mother is so fat that when she goes to the movies, she usually orders popcorn and maybe a drink.

who is the shortest man in the world? ADITYA DEV

Whats worse than death? Getting expelled from Hogwarts

What's the difference between me and an animal? I'm human

Three gay men are in a bath tub and bubbles come up and one says "who farted?"

Fact: 100% of people who drink alcohol will die.

What did the asian say to the President of the United States? I don't speak English

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a baby in your closet.

Why did Carl the cat die? he didnt. he's still alive.

Pianos.

How can you tell if an elepant has been in your refrigerator? It has been destroyed.

Whats white and sticky? Glue.

What's big fat and ugly? A monster

i like punching orphans in the face, you wanna know why? what are they gonna do? tell their parents???

Hoverboards are still not available, and it's already October 21, 2015...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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