why did the squirrel cross the road? -because it was stapled to the chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Knock Knock Who did that?

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Ian Watkins was excited to attend the opening of the children's ward at the hospital today. It went well and the day was a success.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What do you call a person who drinks beer a lot? Alcohol abuser.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

How do you get a clown off of your property? You ask him politely to get off and if he doesn't, you should contact the authorities immediately.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

“DTF”? Says Will. “No” says Harper.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why cant Sally ride her bike? Because she has ceribal pausly

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What did the pirate say to the ninja? I have aids.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Who has big muscles and is good at wrestling? A wrestler

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why couldn't the color blind orphan find his apple? Because he was also blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

why has kallum just changed clothes to speak to a counsellor because he's socially awkward and has no peers

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What's the difference between a picnic table and a Mexican? A picnic table can support a family of four.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

How do you make an emo kid cry? He already is.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did god make women? Because women are equally important when it comes to the birth to maintain or species.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Roses are Red Violets are Blue Walt dies in breaking bad.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Roses are red Violets are blue I've got Alzheimer's Cheese on toast

thumb_up thumb_down +22

The only positive thing in my life, is the HIV test! Lymmel

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A friend of mine said; the only vegetables that makes you cry are oignons. that was before I hit him with a watermelon

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A blond is on her way driving to the airport when she sees the sign "Airport left." She made a left turn and got to her flight on time.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did the jew kill himself? Because he had no foreskin.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? Physics. Why did Tommy fall of his bike? He was hit by 3 monkeys and a refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

(To the pretty girl at the bar) "Was your father a thief? Because I really would like to have sexual intercourse with you."

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What's green fury has 4 legs, and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you. A pool-table

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops