Knock Knock. Who's there? Banana. Impossible, fruits to not have the ability to talk.

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What did the star say to the asteroid? Nothing, astral bodies can't talk, you dipshit.

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Why are rich guys gay? Because they hang around other rich guys

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Why did the black guy still have price tags on his clothes? He forgot to take them off.

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A man walks off a bus. How did he get on top of it in the first place?

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Why does Michael J. Fox always have his martinis shaken? He thinks they taste better that way.

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What happened to the boy who ate a piece of his Halloween candy? He died. It was laced with cyanide.

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what has 2 legs and red all over half a cat.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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why couldnt the man run because he had no legs

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How would I re-arrange the alphabet? I would place P in your butt...

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Why did the penguin die? It got eaten.

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Did you hear about Osama Bin Laden? He's dead.

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Q: What's green and goes round and round and round? A: A baby on a blender

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Why did the chicken cross the playground? Because he was looking for other chickens because he has no friends and he got bullied when he was in 12th grade. He got picked on because he was sledding down his hill in his backyard and he accidentally scraped one side of his face on ice and started bleeding. The next day his classmates started calling him two face.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the food supply was scarce

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"Good Morning, I'm Dr. Pepper" "Like the drink?" "Huh... yes... just like the drink" Would you mind to sit right here Mr..... "Nike" "Oh, just like the shoes" "How do you dare!"

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How long does it take for britney spears to change a light bulb? Fish can not leave the water without dieing.

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Edward Smith had started telling a long rambling joke when William McMaster Murdoch cut him off with "I don't like where this is headed".

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Gretta has five legs? -no

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Why did the girl with a striped ball fall over? She was a victim of a drive-by shooting.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? "Dwane!" I don't know any Dwane. Perhaps you have the wrong address. "Oh. Sorry to have bothered you!"

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What did the man say when he had sex for the first time "So how come I'm the one with the vagina"?

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How far can a baby fly? As far as you can throw it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops