a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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what did one white man say to the other white man? hello!

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God and Allah are having a metaphysical picnic, God says to his fellow deity: "Why do you think so many humans have been killed in our names?" Allah muses upon this for a moment and replies: "Because they think we exist."

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Knock knock Who's there? The police, your mother is dead.

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What do u call a black guy that sell drugs? A nigga

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Do you know what really hurts my feelings? Nerve damage.

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Why Was the student driver using his cell phone in the car? Because he had gotten in a mild accident with a midsized sedan so he was quickly dialing his AAA agent for roadside assistance so he can get back to his loving family and three children

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MOTHER OF GOD!! What is this horse doing in here?!

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What did the penguin say to the peacock? Die, you homosexual!

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Why did the boy throw the clock out of the window? Because it was broken.

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I like my coffee like I like my slaves... Free

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What's the difference between Wayne Gretzky and Courtney Love? They have different proffesions

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the sidewalk he was on does not.

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A man comes home to find his wife in bed with another man. He then joins them.

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I'm so full I could stop eating.

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Why did Sally ask for ketchup? She wanted to use it on her french fries.

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once you go black your credit goes wack

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Knock knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo "who"? Boo Radley. I live down the street.

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why did the man throw a stone in the lake? because he'd had a long day at work.

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A guy wearing a top hat walks into a bar. He says, "Ow."

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What's worse than finding The Holocaust in your apple? Most things, because that's impossible.

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Why are tests such a pain in the ass? Because your vomiting shit you'd learned the night before.

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A man looks at a glass and says that it is half full. Another man looks at the glass and says that it is half empty. A feminist looked at the glass and said it was being raped

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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