Sorry babe, even if I was I would not tell you, the entire place is surrounded, but within enough of a distance, so we will plant a nice setup around the green shack so everyone assumes his deal was some solo operation, if someone else is heading at his direction now, you are gonna get busted, so you better stay down.

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when life gives you lemons you make lemonade when life gives you a homisidle brige you clearly have done something to make life angery

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What did Stephen Hawking say to a prostitute? Push me, and then just touch me, Till I can get my, Satisfaction.

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What's black an blue and doesn't like sex? The 8year old in my trunk.

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My great grandfather died in a concentration camp. The poor guy fell off the guard tower.

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I don't know about the rest of you, but I HATE funerals.

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What came first, the chicken or the egg? The chicken. The chicken always comes first, that's why the egg never comes at all.

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A friend of mine said; the only vegetables that makes you cry are oignons. that was before I hit him with a watermelon

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why did bob hit Jim Because bob didn't like Jim

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How did the person die? He got hit by a car.

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Why did the racecar driver lose his driver's license? He crashed into an orphanage.

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How old is your mom Dead

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What do you call putting a toad in the microwave? Animal cruelty.

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an islamic man with a strange bag walk into thr airport. he is probably heading toward his flight like any other person.

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Grandma used to say "you only die once." Years later, I learned the wisdom behind those words.

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where do you find a dog with no legs? Korea. It's customary for the guests to get the drumsticks.

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Midgets' mouths are perfect height for, kissing other midgets.

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Did you hear the joke about the deaf mail man? No. Neither did he.

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Whats red and crawls up your leg? A homesick abortion.

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How do you get a baby to stop crying? Run it over with a lawn mower!

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Why did the boat sink I shot a missile at it

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What's awesome about going to a no-pants party? Getting stabbed 2 times.

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Why did the girl fall from the swing? She was laughing at an anti-joke.

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SPILL THE BEAAAANNSSSS

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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