Roses are red violets are blue vodka cost less than dinner for two

A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen." The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her, "That driver just insulted me!" The man says, "You go right up there and tell him off! Go ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you."

What starts with "P" and ends with "orn"? Popcorn

Boys go to college to get more knowledge, girls go to Jupiter... Actually I lied, girls go to the kitchen

What's black and white and red all over? A racially integrated society.

Lol... (wow you made me type lol), "like it is nothing to be ashamed of?" Your eyes are really beautiful, honestly probably the most beautiful eyes I have seen... And no, I am not talking about your bewbs.

What's brown and sticky? Vomit.

Knock Knock. Whose there? Fed-Ex, here's your new brother.

This is funny.

What do you call a woman when you're inside her? Mom.

What do you call a black man driving a expensive sports car? A respectable member of society

Q. What do you call a black pilot A. A pilot

Yo momma so fat, when she went out side in a red dress, everyone yelled "HEY, KOOL-AID!"

What did one saggy boob say to the other one? Better perk up or they'll think we're nuts.

Person1: Man I had the worst day ever. Person2: Worser than the holocaust.

Immigration Laws

What did the straw say to the other straw? We are both straws just kidding they cant talk

a black guy walks into a store and is caught stealing things the police are called they get there and hes calmly escorted to the police car

What is the french word for penis? I cannot say because I do not possess an adequate knowledge of the language.

What is worse than throwing your baby in the river? Letting Moses out of Egypt

Why did the bud driver drop his ice cream? Because he hit a boy.

Why did the Mexican fail his english test? Because he had studied for an inadequate amount of time and proceeded to fornicate with many women, also preventing him from sleeping for the advised 7-8 hours a night.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, ask the chicken.

What happened to the mentaly challenged person is walking down the street? He pooped on the sidewalk and got escorted to his house

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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