This Irishman walked into a pub and then drank hard liquor for the next 3 hours.

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Whats black,white and red all over? A penguin in a blender

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hiya

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What do you call a black man flying a plane. A pilot.

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What worse than stubbing your toe? Getting raped by a panda.

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roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimers but at least i do not have Alzheimers

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A family of five sit on a bench, the bench falls the family die.

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What did the frog say to the goat? Nothing frogs can't talk.

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Knock, Knock Whos there? Banana Banana Who? Banana i didn't say your moms dead.

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How do you know when an Asian has robbed your house? You have informed the police, who in turn searched the house for DNA evidence, eventually leading them to the criminal, who just so happened to be a troubled Asian teenager attempting to join a local gang.

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Don't chop the dinosaur daddy! OK.

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A Chinese man, an Italian man and a French man are sitting in a plane. They arrive in Los Angeles with a 23 minute delay due to atmospheric conditions

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Nero, I am happy to hear from you again, but it kinda sounds like you are going to get yourself killed or something. Is there something else I can do? If that asshole is suffering, kill him after he is done doing it, I am done with that piece of shit. Honestly, what is going on Nero? You are not going to suicide or something are you? Please respond, right away, or I wont call your wife.

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Mom now that I am fourteen can I get a bra now? No Harold!

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took my chevy to the levy but the levy was dry

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What did the straw say to the other straw? We are both straws just kidding they cant talk

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How do you kill a turtle? You can't, it has a shell for a reason.

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Why did the mexican cross the street? Because the next lawn to mow was in a different neighborhood

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How do you get a black kid to sleep? A cup of warm milk and maybe a lulluby should do it.

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What's Pi times the square root of a panda's earlobe? Panda's do not have earlobes... thus the answer is inexplicable.

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why did the kid fall off his bike he had a serious illness which made it difficult for him to play sports

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Sarah Jessica Parker walks into a bar. Bartender asks her, "why the long face?". She tells him it's from her parent's genes.

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Patient: "Doctor, I've got a strawberry stuck up my bum." Doctor: "I've got some cream for that."

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Stephen Hawking is so paranoid, always looking over his shoulder.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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