Why did the chicken cross the road. He didn't, this joke gets old really fast

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Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

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What is it... Michael J Fox has a small one, modonna doesnt have one, Arnold Shwatznegger has a long one, the pope doesn't use his, and bill clinton uses his a lot. A last name

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What did the people say to each other when they ate the orange? Orange you glad I didn't eat you:) HAHAHAA orange you glad that I am good at telling jokes!

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Michael J Fox may not be able to draw a perfect circle but he sure can jerk off like a champ

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why was allison crying? because her mom's dead.

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my girlfriend had a weird fetish, she used to dress up like herself and act like a bitch all the time.

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Why did jasmine drop her shopping? And no its not because she did'nt have arms infact she did have arms she just did'nt have any hands

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autsim

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How do you get a blonde to stop talking? Hit her in the head with a brick.

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Your mother's so ugly she has low self-esteem

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why are little kids like tree's? ... they both fall down when you hit them with an axe.

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why wasnt nathan invited the party? nathan's been dead for 5 years

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The past, the present and the future walk into a bar. It was tense.

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Why did the girl fall off the swingset? Because she got hit by a refridgerator.

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Wheres my hood? Behind your neck.

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Racecar is spelled the same forwards and backwards. Masturbation does not work.

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Your momma's so fat that she should really be concerned for her health and seek professional help to manage her weight.

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Like does not mean said. You can blame Justin Bieber for that one, cuz he was like "Baby Baby Baby" and I was like "no"

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The family performs an array of disgusting sexual acts. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "It has no name."

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Situation: 2 cows eating grass on a warm Sunday night. Question: Why does 9+4=3 1/2? Answer: 69!

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what happened to the fish that got washed ashore? it died due to lack of water-borne air particles.

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What's the difference between a microwave and hamster? They're both furry except for the microwave

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roses are red violets are blue if u wanna fight call 111 ( we r in new zealand)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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