what did the mother say to the banana? I'm going to eat you like your father.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? a brick.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer procrastinated fixing the latch on the coop. Did his wife warn him this would happen? Yessss! Did he listen? Noooo!

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Why did the Fly die? Cause it died the average life span is 30 days.

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What does AIDS smell like? AIDS has no smell. AIDS is a diease contracted though sexual contact with another being with the diease. It greatly increases the risk of infections and malignancy. Although AIDS has no smell, in the final stages large sores develope on the surface of the skin. This means you are going to die. Thus, HIV/AIDS has no smell.

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What is the difference between my dog and my girlfriend? I love my dog

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't

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Why did little Jimmy fall off his bike? Because I threw a fridge at him.

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why can't Michael Jackson bake a pie???? Because he's dead

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One time, as a dare, John was forced to eat 5 king size chocolate bars, 3 cakes, 8 Oreo Milkshakes, and 7 packages of Krispy Kreme Donuts. As a result, John has diabetes.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She has no arms.

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why did the man leave his house during a state of emergency? he didnt

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How do you know when you have had too much to drink? When you ran over 7 pedestrians and are lying in the back of a police vehicle

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What's worse than your console not switching on? A mutilated body.

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whats worse than 10 dead babies in a bucket 5 are alive and eating the others

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Ask me any question. Okay, what is your favorite color? I refuse to answer.

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when life gives you lemons, force a hobo to eat them because lemonade is going to suck if life doesnt give you any sugar.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because Acl tear stepped on a spit.

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What did one alligator say to the other alligator? Ear

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he is concerned about his fitness and decided to walk to work instead of drive.

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A mountain goat walks into a bar, the bar mans asks ''so, what will it be?''. The other customers question the mental integrity of the bar man, as goats cannot talk.

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What did the plant say to the human. Nothing.

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wanna hear a joke? womans rights

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Why did the Albino cross the road? He was going to the skin pigment store.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops