How do you get a girls number? Grow some balls and ask for it.

How to condom style ! Ayyyyyyy thts ur baby ! No! No! No! No! No! No! Broken condom style ;)

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped.

The song Barbra Streisand has more than 2 words.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He got hit in the head with a brick.

What happens when you Shoot a guy with a red Shirt On? He Dies.

What do you call a clown with no sense of humor? Unemployed.

Why a frog can fly? It has magic. Why a snake can fly? It ate the magic frog. Why a eagle can fly? It has wings.

Why's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into a worm and finding a golden ticket

I FEEL LIKE I'M RIDING ON A CLOUD actually it's physically impossible to ride on clouds because they are sparsely situated ice particles.

Knock Knock *Opens door* Hi John, you got here right on time!

Why did the Pakistani man cry when the Nigerian man was killed in a terrorist attack? They were lovers.

My peni s

why was six afraid of seven? because seven eight nine

What did the pretty young girl get for her birthday? Cake and presents (get your mind out of the gutter).

How many dead babies does it take to fill a bathtub? 17

Q. Why were the children sad? A. They'd just been abducted by a dodgy old man in a van.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

What happened when the engineering student studied for a physics final? They failed.

You know its time to leave when she wake's up out of her coma and your balls are on her chin.

why did the hobo want cancer so badly? he really needed a haircut

What's the difference between a jew and a jew? They both died in the gas chamber.

What did the transvestite hooker say when he/she saw a robot fighting a dinosaur? That's strange.

what do you call a old guy who touches children? my dad

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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