What did the women get after valentines day? An abortion.

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What's special about an Irish Parachute ? It's made in Ireland.

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A horse walks into a bar. The owner promptly calls a local farmer to let him know that his horse has escaped again.

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What do you call a black man helping an old woman cross the road? A concerned citizen.

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This is an anti-joke. It is not funny because "anti" means the opposite of something.

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knock knock "whos there ?" "the police , your husband has died" "ok"

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A man is walking down the beach and he spots an antique looking lamp in the sand, he picks it up and rubs it. Nothing happens and the man begins to cry realizing that his life is so dismal and pathetic he was ready to believe he had found a magic lamp. He proceeds to run into the water and bash himself senseless with a large rock until he passes out and drowns.

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Have you heard the one about the Priest, the Pastor, and the Mail Man? -no, how's that go? Oh you haven't? That's too bad, it's really good.

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What does a female Nazi call a tampon? A twatskika.

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A good antijoke? Going to the last few pages of the "Popular" antijoke section....

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What's the difference between the NBA and the WNBA? What's the WNBA?

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There are 2 muffins in an oven One of the muffins says to the other 'Jeez it's hot in here' Then the other muffin replied, 'OH MY GOD IT'S A FRICKEN TALKING MUFFIN!!!!!!!!

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Roses are nice, Violets are glorious, Try not to scare, Oscar Pistorius.

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A man walked into a bar. Ouch.

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whats worst then geting a used condom put in your mouth geting wraped by mario then lugi

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whats bad about being black and jewish they have to sit in the back of the oven

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Why couldn't the pirate play poker? Poker is a tricky game - maybe he'd never been taught how to play.

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How many teachers would it take to find their way out of a maze? Depends on their area of speciality. If the teacher(s) are mathematicians or logicians, probably one or two at most. If they are home economics teachers, possibly more.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? I lost my tractor.

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Roses are red, violets blue, um... that's all i got.

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My brother is crazy... crazy like a fox! I caught him eating a Possum on the side of the road yesterday.

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead

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Q:If quizes are, "guizicles," then what are tests? A:Who calls quizes, "quizicles?"

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what did the penguin use as a napkin? a napkin

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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