What's the difference between a dead black man in the road, and a dead dog in the road? One is a human being that probably leaves behind family and friends that will miss his absence. The other is an animal that will also be missed, but to a lesser degree since dogs don't form a bond with people other than the family it shared its life with. In either of the two cases, if I witnessed the accident that caused the death, I would promptly notify the authorities so as to make sure that the driver of the vehicle that hit them would be subjected to a breathalyzer test.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What did the rapist say to the child? Contrary to popular belief, I am just a kind old man that likes to hand out sweets to disadvantaged young children. I only got dubbed a rapist when a child crawled into the back of my van as I drove off; the fact that his abusive father was the one who raped him is not my fault.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did Suzie get raped? because she was out past her bedtime. and the morale to this story is that its funny to be raped.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

how many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop? Not enough

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A dyslexic man walks into a bra

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's black, white, and red all over? Numerous different objects because many different things can posses a variety of colors, including the ones listed above.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

So mind telling me why you wont call me? And why, you know... Are you avoiding this condition of yours?

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the blonde woman decide to get plastic surgery? Because she was self-conscious and unhappy with the way she looked.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

stephen hawking walks into a bar...

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Two guys walk into A bar. The third one ducks.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

So Nero, do we tell people your comments are all containing codes and stuff so we can stay in touch?

thumb_up thumb_down +7

ask me what my temperpedic bed is like. ''whats it like?'' i dont know ive never had one actully.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Q : WHAT DID THE SMALL SHEEP SAY TO THE BIG SHEEP ? Z : BÆÆÆ

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why are all the tech support people from India? That's where the majority of call centers are located.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Whats a lion in Antartica? . Dead

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Hello

thumb_up thumb_down +7

whats worth than finding half a dead worm in your apple getting rapped by your step dad

thumb_up thumb_down +7

whats worse then getting a parking ticket? the plague

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Today we eat large amounts of pizza. The one piece had a lot of mushrooms. Like more than the other pieces. The cheese was flawless except for the burnt edges.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What do you tell your chicken when it is it's birthday. Nothing, because he wouldn't understand you.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Knock Knock Who's there? Me ill kill u,

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Wanna hear a joke? No? Oh

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What do 9 out of every 10 people enjoy? Gangrape.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Jimmy's mom: Jimmy go do your chores now!! Jimmy: You shut your mouth, whore. Get your smelly ass back in the kitchen!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops