I once saw a picture of a man who was bloodily murdered with his testicles replacing his eyes. then i had a nightmare, that was completely unrelated

What is more annoying then finding a worm in your apple you

sometimes when im bored i dress in white pour water on the ground and roll around in it and pretend im a papertowel

What is the difference between a pumpkin and a dead baby? There are thousands of differences between a dead human and the fruit of a pumpkin plant. One of them is that I didn't choke my wife to death with a pumpkin. Another is that pumpkins have a stem.

Why was the Japanese man unable to see? Because it was extremely sunny outside and he had forgotten to wear sunglasses.

What looks good hanging from trees? Spanish moss.

I was watching two muffins baking in an oven. One said to the other, "Wow, it's hot in here." The other one said "Wow! A talking muffin!" I went to my psychiatrist the next day, to increase the dosage on my medication.

How many babies does it take to paint a house? It depends on how hard you throw them.

Face...tastes like chicken!

Q: How many children did it take to screw in a light bulb? A: The light bulb was already screwed in and exploded after excessive tampering

What is black white and red all over? A zebra which a lion did not finish eating.

Josh Moran sticks polish sausage up his ear and moves it back and forth while squeezing his balls until they rupture.

WILLYS

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

What do you call a shoe with milk in it.... A milk shoe....

why did the girl go into the kitcen? she was preparing a meal for her well safisticated family which had not ate dinner yet that day.

How do you find out the population of Mexico? The census.

what do you use to blindfold chinese person? dental floss!!

Why did the woman accuse a black man of stealing from a bank? Because she was eating a cornmuffin on the bench across the street when she saw a black man,stealing money from a bank

what kind of mexicans are NOT in the U.S. -legal

Sarah Jessica Parker

A Native American walks into a casino. He wants to invest a protion of his earnings from his fortune 500 company into it because he believes it to be a profitable venture.

so i was F***in this guy the other day with my penis.....shit! i mean i was F***in this girl and i jizzed

Thumbs up if u dont have aids:)

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...