Why couldn't dracula's wife get to sleep? She had insomnia.

Why was the black man chasing the little girl? The black man was the adoptive parent of the little girl and they were playing tag.

Hello world

Why did the snowman melt? It got tired of everyday life and decided that it would be best if he disappeared from society... His name was Dave...

Knock knock. Who's there? Cannibal. Cannibal wh... As the man opened the door, he was eaten. And they lived happily ever after. The end.

I love you very much.

why did Tommy fall of his bike? because he was getting raped by a walrus

A man buys free health care...

Why did the chicken cross the road? There was food there.

What's the difference between a baby and a pineapple? Pineapples were not shot by nazis during the holocaust.

What did the Jewish man get for Christmas? Nothing. He is Jewish, therefore he does not celebrate Christmas, he celebrates Hanukkah. So he won't get a present for Christmas, he will get eight presents for Hanukkah. (He'll like getting a good deal).

A pornstar walks into a church, she has remained close to Christ despite her condescending career choice.

1+1= 69

All dead all doom or all dead? How can you choose the question doesn't make sense. dead all dooom ohhhaklsdjfla;ksdjfal;skfjasd

Why did the man fall over screaming? Because he got shot in the leg

Why did the groom have cold feet? Because his socks were slightly damp resulting in evaporation and the cooling of his feet, as well as the cold weather in December.

What do you call a mix between a beaver and a mammal? You can't mix beavers and mammals, and even if I had said a platypus that would not have been funny.

Yo mama so poor... that she possesses substantially less money than the average person working hard in order to accumulate money today.

What's the difference between a watermelon and a car? A lot.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad I didn't say mustache? ...No. I wish you had said mustache.

What did Batman say to Robin before getting in the Batmobile? "Get in the Batmobile"

What do you call a black man flying a plane? Answer: A Pilot

How many jews can you fit in a buick? 6...only if you squeeze 4 in the back.

How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? One, it's just a lightbulb

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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