How do you escape from being enlisted in the army of your nation? Flee to a different country and bring along your valuables.

Nickelback

How much does a polar bear weigh?. . .Approximately 515 kilos.

blubber vaginass CC

What Is somthing that is 5 "5" and white A 5 "5" white person

Q: What did the man say to the sexy female nurse with long hair and big breasts? A: I have diarrhea.

Why did Lebron leave Cleveland? It's a terrible place to live.

What's the difference between a screwdriver and DJ Pauly D? One's a tool and one is an inanimate object.

Hey, does this rag smell like chloroform to you?

My life

You.

My hair is thin, therefore the person beside me wears oddly looking clothes CC

What is green but looks like a silver car? A silver car....I lied about the green part.

William Raines.

All of these jokes suck. Just saying.

Q. What do you call the person that graduated at the bottom of his medical department? A. Doctor

What happened to the blonde who blew out her birthday candles? Her hair caught on fire

I love you.

A Catholic Priest, an Anglican Priest, and a Rabbi were in a train carriage together because they got a package deal to go to a conference on religious tolerance. Good for them.

Mmmmmmm Lemons

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a snake in your liver. Because that could be hazardous to your health.

A little gir gets stung by a bee. Her parents see the bump She now geting meletedin Rehab because her parents saw her shoot up heroine.

How did the mecanic die? He drowned

Why did the giant try to eat the magical rainbow? A: Because the apocalypse is predicted for the Wednesday after santa gets shot by the evil jolly ice cream man which in secret is cheating on his wife who in turn eats every human baby ever known to man. duhhhhh

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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