What did Osama bin Laden say to Jesus? Nothing. He's in hell.

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have you seen stevie wonder's house. no? Well nethier has he you

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I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis.

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I put children on a leash and store them under my bed. I feed them bird food and they drink eachothers urine.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have a gun Get in the van

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There was a blonde, brunette, and a redhead. They are spending a relaxing afternoon together as a result of being restricted to their heavy therapeutic sessions which they are constantly in need of because all three have been diagnosed with clinic depression since everyone jokes about them so much and in conclusion, they don't see each other very often.

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I'm HIV positive.

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Q: Why are black people so tall? A: Not all black people are tall, and if they are it is probably from their specific genes.

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What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

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What's the different between a blond and a brunette? Blondes taste better when cut into small pieces and fried in a skillet.

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quantum physics?

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So I was making love to my cat the other day, and my pet dog comes in.

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obama

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How do you kill a blonde? Tell her she can breath underwater.

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What did the mentaly handycap kid get for christmas. A Bop-It

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Logan's gay

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roses are red, no one gives a shit, get back in the kitchen and bring me my chicken dips!

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A blonde walks into an electronic store...she buys an IPhone because someone stole her blackberry, her money, and everything she cares for. Nah, I'm just kiddin', she was murdered.

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A small black boy was walking down the street. He ran into a police officer and the police officer shot him, why? A: Because the officer was racist.

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What Happens when you kill a dragon? Nothing, there not real.

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Tim: Ya know what was wondering? Paul: What? Tim: Actually, I'm not wondering about it anymore.

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What's long, yellow, and can kill you if swallowed? A school bus

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Yo momma so old that she should be concerned about mesothelioma and asbestoses, as she may have lived during a period of increased asbestos use. She may also be at risk of osteoporosis and should take vitamin supplements daily to improve her rapidly deteriorating health.

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What kind of shots does John take at night? Insulin, because he's a diabetic.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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