Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? - Because it died.

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69 :) 3====D:). [{}]:)

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A pterodactyl walks into a bar, bartender says "What'll you have." To which the pterodactyl graciously replies "RAAAAAAAAWWWWWWWRRRRRRRRR." Because pterodactyl's do not speak English.

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What's worse than 10 babies stapled to a tree? The Holocaust.

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you cant spell slaughter withought laughter

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A white man, a black man, and a woman are drinking in the local pub. The black man and the woman are hanged. Medieval European pubs did not permit either.

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so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

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Q: What does one man with alzheimer's say to the other man with alzheimer's. A: Purple, because magic doesn't go through chickens.

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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What does have stripes, give milk and can fly? A zebra, a cow and an eagle.

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What's more annoying than reading a joke you can't understand? ?????

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Q: Who`s the badly treated kid at school who always faces punishment, but is inadvertently provided with recompense every single day (s)he attends class A: The poeple who fall into the category that does not encompass the people who are treated with dignity at school and never experience punishment there, but always receive some kind of reward for trying to succeed anyways.

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What is blue? The sky! Hahaha best joke to laught at with all of your buds hehehehehee

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What did the vampire use to make tea? Hot water, a kettle, and some nice green tea leaves given to him by his great uncle for kwanza.

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Why did the man get go to sleep? He got hit in the face with a hammer.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The Ambulance. Ambulance who? Sir, we're going to need you to come down to the hospital, your son is dead.

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How many napkins does it take to tack to the moon? Purple, snakes don't have elbows

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Q: You and a thousand other people are suddenly bursting in flames at a park, there is a big barrel of water just a few steps away from you, what do you do in order to save the people that truly matter? A: Stop drop and roll, duh!

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A blonde lady has a sore throat. Her colleague tells her that whenever she has a sore throat, she performs oral sex on her husband and swallows, and this cures the problem. The next day, the blonde comes into work. The colleague asks if she followed her advice, and the blonde says yes and it worked. The blonde also passes a message from her boyfriend thanking her colleague for the suggestion. The two sets of spouses eventually became close friends and were godparents to each others' children.

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Girlfriend: OMG! what could be worst than you cheating on me? Holocaust

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Why was little David sad? His father got hit by a truck.

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What did the woman say to the dog? Stop shitting on my carpet your dickhole

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WILLY

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Wanna hear a joke about a baby with AIDS? It never gets old.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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