Your momma's so fat, she died on the operating table during her bypass surgery.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

what did the indian boy say to his friend? I wish you were real

thumb_up thumb_down -19

"Hey baby, how much?" "$2.99 each or 2 for $5.00, Steve." "Thanks Baby, I'll take 2."

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Q. What's a pirate's favorite type of movie? A. It depends on the individual pirate, although most modern-day pirates are from third world countries like Somalia and so are too poor to be able to watch many movies. Classical pirates like those depicted in Treasure Island or Pirates of the Carribean are, of course, from a period of history before movies had been invented, so couldn't possibly have had a favorite.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Coming this fall, A hilarious movie for the whole family to enjoy, actor Rob Schneider play a very normal man would goes to work everyday to support his family who he loves more than anything in the world, critics are saying that this is the most vulgar slapstick comedy of the year as Rob Schneider teaches his two adopted kids the power of Jesus Christ. Coming this fall... The Nun's Birthday Rated R for excessive nudity of Rob Schneider and an asian hooker.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

hey I just met you and this is crazy but get in my van

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Q: If a hen-and-a-half can lay an egg-and-a-half in a day-and-a-half, how long would it take a peg-legged grasshopper to kick the seeds out of a dill pickle? A: He'd give up.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why did the chicken cross the road, roll in the mud, and cross back again? Because he was a dirty double crosser

thumb_up thumb_down -19

q

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What did the blind pole vaulter say to the speed skater? Hi, how are you?

thumb_up thumb_down -19

I asked my wife to make me a sandwich. I had forgotten she was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Roses are red Violets are blue Tulips are yellow Grass is green

thumb_up thumb_down -19

My little league baseball coach measured the team for cups. Its 9 years later and we still dont have those cups.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why aren't dragons real? Because if any animal were to breath fire (let alone have a gland that produced it), they would cease to live for their necks would scorch from the inside out.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

why don't asians use this finger (point at pinky)? because it's my finger.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Roses are red Violets are blue i have a gun get in the van

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Who died first the cow or the cow? The Cow

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What have in common a recently born baby and a quadriplegic blonde person? Both have legs but they cant walk

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What's black, blue, and read all over? The newspaper.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Truth is Jordan Abu aita has a hairy @ss

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Guess what Timmy got for Christmas, Nothing, Timmy has no parents, he's an orphan.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Q: Whats red and bad for your teeth? A: a brick

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What do you call a man with a spade in his head? ...An innocent, family orientated murder victim.  X

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What did Tarzan say when he saw a herd of Elephants coming over the hill? Oh look, a herd of Elephants coming over the hill.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops