Why did the little girl pull her hair out? She didn't, It's a side-effect of the chemotherapy.

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a murderer sees a young child left alone at a park... he promptly finds the childs mother and returns her to her home.

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Why was the girl unhappy with her male teacher? Because he gave her a bad grade...and raped her the night before.

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What is the key to a good anti-joke? A disappointing or intellectual punch-line said in a calm and passive tone.

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What did the homosexual get for Christmas off his boyfriend? A lovely present off his loving partner.

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Why do dragons shoot fire? I don't know, I'm asking you the question.

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Bob: Your mama's so fat, she rolled over four quarters and made a dollar! Todd: YOur mama's so fat, here's a picture of her tied up in my basement. Todd wins the insult war.

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the only thing i learned in geometry is when you push two circles together it makes a titty venn diagram

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Why was Katy Perry naked with your mom? Because they were having sex

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why did the jewish man die answer The hollucost

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Why did the turtle fall out of the car? It forgot to buckle up

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Terminator XXXIVXXX Regensisysydioniosis. Watch as the terminators return in this year`s summer blockbuster, they return to a time before the birth of Connors grandfather and manage to destroy the world, then the only decision left is for humanity in another timeline to travel back as the terminators are destroyed, but they travel back again so that! But that wont happen before Terminator: Los Pollos Hermanos.

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender suddenly runs out the door frantically yelling, "He's got a gun! He's got a gun!" Meanwhile, inside the bar, the patrons overpowered the gunman, tied him up and took his weapon and all the cash he had. They later used his money to buy more drinks at another bar.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? So he could get to the hospital before he lost to much blood from his stab wound.

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-Knock knock! -Who's there? -DEFAX.

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Why did the black man fall down? A guy pushed him.

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homosexual rights to marriage

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-What's the difference between Michael Phelps and Hitler? Michael Phelps can finish a race.

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a piece of string walks into a bar and the bartender says “sorry we dont serve your kind here” so the string goes outside twists himself round and ruffles up one of his ends then walks back into the bar, the bartender says “aren’t you the piece of string i just kicked out?” the string then replies “i’m a frayed knot”

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Why can't Chuck Norris die? He can, he's just a normal human being.

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What's worse than leaving the maternity ward with the wrong child? Being a parent.

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What do you do when you find a blonde on her knees? Help her up, because obviously she has fallen.

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Why did the boy cross the road? He was visiting his dying grandmother at the hospital.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? Blind.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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