Brian knew how to save the world from the death penalty: "Let's kill everybody who is not against it." So I killed Brian and waste my time in death row now.

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Q: What do you call a person with no arms and no legs ??? A: Stumpy

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WITH YOUR RED THUMBS COMBINED! I AM CAPTAIN MORAL! You: GOOOOO (AWAY) MORAL! CAPTAIN MORAL MAN, IS A HERO, GONNA TAKE GREEN THUMBS RIGHT BACK TO ZERO... Moral: Okay that is all I remember about the Captain Planet Theme song... GIVE ME RED THUMBS MUAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA! PS: Redhead, three months have passed (more or less) I wont call you because we agreed you would get of this fucking place, but I can visit you if you are a good little girl! And yeah I am calling you Red, Tifa just reminds me of Final Fantasy and your big bosoms so yeaaaaah get your little red haired cunt over here so we can chat yes?

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Bill is driving along the Interstate.All the sudden, a refrigerator falls off the truck in front of him.The fridge slams into Bill's car.He dies instantly.

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Whats worse than getting hit in the face with an axe? Getting hit in the face with two axes.

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p lkl

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roses are gray, violets are gray, Im a dog

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What's the difference between a black man and a bench? A bench can support a family

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What did the cow say to the chicken crossing the road? Moo

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What worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into an apple and finding 2 worms

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? That depends on what his name is.

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There is no "I" in "TEAM" However, there is a "T" an "E" an "A" and an "M"

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WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD?

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A blonde walks into a bar. She enjoys a refreshing, cold beverage with friends before returning home to sleep ahead of another day of hard work as a scientist.

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What did the doctor say to the seriously ill patient? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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What did one tampon say to another? Nothing they were both stuck up.

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What do gay horses eat? Horse dick.

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What's worse than breaking your arm? Not having any arms.

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How did Ronald McDonald die He was hit by a big mac

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How many policemen does it take to change a lightbulb? None they just beat up the room for being black

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Why didn't the TV turn on? Nobody switched it on.

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A man watched his city burn. He was traumatized by the loss of his friends and family and went to therapy to recover.

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"Why can't you hear pterodactyl when it goes to the bathroom?" "Because the pee is silent?" "No, because they are dead, you idiot."

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Knock knock! Go away. I'm busy masturbating, and it would be extremely awkward if you were to entire my residence at this time. Please return at a later hour.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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