A: What's worse than two dead babies lying on cement? B: The Holocaust? A: Yeah or something like that

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Who didn't allow the gorilla into the ballet studio? Whoever was in charge.

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A cow and a goat are at the top of a hill. The cow starts to eat the grass, and the goat says, "Hey! That's mine!"

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Knock knock. Who's there? Just use the peephole. I am.

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And so the baseball says to the tractor........ Your not my dad

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What is the first letter of the alphabet? A. a B. 7 C. Mustard gas D. Because a penguin has 2 legs

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An asian walks into class to take a math test. He did not study and consistently misbehaves and promptly fails.

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What did the apple say to the carrot? Nothing, apples don't talk

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got a gun, get in the van.

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Q: why did the 10 year old squirt his dad with the water hose? A: what 10 year old WOULDN'T?

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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what's hotter than my cousin's girlfriend? I don't know. she's remarkably hot. like, one of the hottest people I personally know.

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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What happened to Jillian when she walked out the door? She got hit by a bus A. Knock knock B. Whos there? A. Not Jillian

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Hey I Just Met You And This Is Crazy But I Am Pregnant And It's Yhur Baby ~GotDemChoozen

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A Japanese man, a Canadian man and a French woman walk into a bar. They do not converse because they don't speak the same language.

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I like it it the butt -Tyler James Nehring call me 863-670-1547

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What did the blind man say to the mentally challenged man when he bumped into him? Watch where you're going, retard.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To pick up the remains of the thousands of his friends that lost their lives to this joke.

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What does a Twihard, a Brony, a Belieber and a Gleek all have in common? They all ruin the Internet.

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One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose petal fell on your head." "MMMMBBBWWAAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

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Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? -- Because it was dead Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? -- Because it was stapled to the squirrel

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YOLO

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Yo mama so fat when she went to the ocean the whales started to sing we are family even though your fatter than me

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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