An Italian, a Mexican, and an American are eating lunch on a bridge. The Mexican drops his taco off the side of the bridge and the Italian and American were kind enough to share some of their lunch with the Mexican making it a successful picnic. Their ethnicity was not relevent at all.

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How do you mess with Hellen Keller? Re-arrange her furniture.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? - "Where's my tractor?"

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Two muffins are in an oven. They procede to bake at 325 degrees for thirty minutes.

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What do you get when you cross an Indian and a duck? An Indian duck.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

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One day, a mother was speaking with her daughters. "Mommy," the first one said, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we brought you home, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Mommy," the second daughter said, "Why did you name me Rose?" ""Because when we brought you home, a rose petal fell on your head." "MMMBWWAAAAGGGH!" the last daughter cried. She was born with severe special needs and is incapable of coherent speech.

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I flipped through the Yellow Pages, made a few calls, and found the Chinese man I was looking for.

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What is the difference between tea pot and shinkansen? shinkansen is very quick train and tea pot is traditional piece of dishes..

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A man walks off the top of a very tall building. Why did he fall off? Because he was blind

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why did suzie fall off the swing? because shes autistic and her mother likes to abuse her.

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Q:If a tree falls in the forest and nobody is here to hear it, will it make a noise A:That Philosopher probably had a lot of herbal tea in the morning

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How many Mexicans does it take to cross the border? Don't answer, just think and laugh.

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Why did the car catch fire? It was parked in Ferguson, MO

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Whats the worst part about being fat. Your fat.

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What do you call Metta World Peace after he has hit somebody? Metta World War.

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what do you call a black man sleeping on a park bench at 2 in the morning? Homeless

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Why did the boy live on the street? He was an orphan.

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roses are red, violets are blue, i have AIDS, now so do you.

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Your dad is so fat, that eventually he got on Biggest Loser and ended living a very successful life.

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1,2,3,4,5..what comes next? yeah you should know how to count

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The boy asks his dad if he can make him a sandwitch The dad reply's " no thats your moms job"

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What's green and hangs from trees? Leafs

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a kid says, "where are you from?" other kid says "my mom"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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