What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your BANANA.

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What did the apple say to the orange? Nothing because apples can't talk.

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What had 82 eyes, 7 mouths, and sings the blues? Nothing, the described creature does not exist.

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whats the best kind of chocolate bar? a larsbar

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why do jews like money? So they can support their family.

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What do you say to an over weight Jewish mother? "Work on those crunches" He was her coach.

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What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? A waste of time because they just be playing soccer

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What's worse than an asian driver? A blindfolded asian driver.

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I would tell you a joke about a pencil but there would be no point.

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What do an elephant and a can of soup have in common? Neither one can ride a bicycle.

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quantum physics?

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Knock knock Whos there? Sorry, wrong house,goodbye!

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Man goes to the doctors, says doctor, im depressed. ive tried everything but i just cant see the bright side of life anymore, it seems empty to me, like theres no point in existing. The doctor certifies the man as clinically depressed and alerts the relevant authorities.

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why did the chicken cross the road? it wanted to why did the bubble gum cross the road? it was on the chickens foot

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How do you get a clown off a swing? Hold his family at gun point

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So I was walking along the beach one day and I see this whale. Then this dolphin named Lennie came up and was like, "Hey whale, how've you been? I haven't seen you in a while." And the whale was like, "Sorry, but I can't talk to you." And Lennie was like, "Whyever not?" And the whale said, "Because I'm not a starfish!"

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what did the n i g g e r with alzheimers say to the c h i n k? 9/11 was the funniest fake joke since the holocaust and 9/11 and the holocaust and 9/11... and... what?

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So a woman goes to the doctor for an ultra-sound. The doctor says I have good news. The woman inquisitively replies what is it doctor, the doctor replies ; Your baby is Dead.

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whats fat and sits on a toilet? a fat guy sitting on the toilet

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If you have $5 and Chuck Norris has $5, Chuck Norris now has $10.

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My daughter's so smart, that instead of texting K, she writes Potassium.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because yo mama so fat and the pig ate my poop

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Suzie.

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Two stoners walk into a bar. They didn't drive there because they were high and wanted to enjoy a cool, evening stroll.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops