Person A: I think your father might be a thief, I'm not sure though. Person B: How come? person A: I cannot find my virginity. Person B: I apologize my dad taught me well.

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one stop shop

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Which does does the Mississippi River flow in? Liquid.

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Why couldn't the boy talk? He had his fathers hairy scrote was in his mouth

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Why do I exist? Because my mom gave birth to me.

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Why didn't Avery die when he got hit by a bus? The bus was going three miles per hour.

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What is white, black, and red all over? A: A zebra being slaughtered.

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Hi welcome to yack in da box, can i hell you? Yes, could i have a jumbo jack? Jew wanna yumbo yack? Yes.

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A man walks into a bar. Three weeks later he gets a liver transplant.

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SEX

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How do you kill batman? you stab him through the heart

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What happed when the homeless shelter went out of business? -Everyone went hungry and died.

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You remind me of something What? Monday Why? Nobody likes you

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Why do midgets wear condoms? To avoid unwanted pregnancies and sexually transmitted diseases.

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Why did Lindsay Lohan talk to her car? Because she's insane

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okay so theres this guy.

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A priest and a rabbi attempt to take a whale to a bar. But due to the enormous size and the need for water, the whale couldnt come.

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the firefighter says to the other firefighter: hey firefighter, are we going to fight a fire?

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Why did the person write an antijoke? To get to the other side

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-How much wood would a woodchuck chuck, if a woodchuck could chuck wood? -Probably a decent amount.

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your face

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? A cripple.

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A man with a PhD walks up to a college student and jokingly says "Hey dude, what did the hat say to the other hat?" The student replies "My name is Joe and a hat does not have a mouth, therefore it cannot speak." The student is then unimpressed on how uneducated the man is, also worring about how the man was able to receive a PhD.

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I am fine, hungry but otherwise fine, I sometimes wish that things that come easy to you, did the same for me or others, excuse me, going to grab a bite, I hope we can chat here for a bit, it is not a chatting site the least. Say? Are you still burning mad at me? If not ill gladly give you a call, but if this is a ploy you are scheming in order to gain my trust I might be killing myself.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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